And Then We Turn Around To Find Out That *We* Were The Assholes

[morgandawn]

7 Reasons The 21st Century Is Making You Miserable

"Let's say, as a huge DragonForce fan, you can go find their forum and meet a dozen people just like you. Or even better, start a private room with your favorite few and lock everybody else out. Say goodbye to the tedious, awkward, painful process of dealing with somebody who's truly different. That's another Old World inconvenience..... The problem is that peacefully dealing with incompatible people is crucial to living in a society. In fact, if you think about it, peacefully dealing with people you can't stand is society. Just people with opposite tastes and conflicting personalities sharing space and cooperating, often through gritted teeth.

Fifty years ago, you had to sit in a crowded room to see a movie. You didn't get to choose; you either did that or you missed the movie. When you got a new car, everyone on the block came and stood in your yard to look it over. You can bet that some of those people were assholes."

This fits into what I've been thinking for a while: the online experience allows you to create a customized cocoon giving you what you want, when you want, now. And when we bump into people who...who... Think Differently! we find ourselves awash in a sea of hurt and and betrayal and outrage.

"There's one advantage to having mostly online friends, and it's one that nobody ever talks about: They demand less from you.

Sure, you emotionally support them, comfort them after a breakup, maybe even talk them out of a suicide. But knowing someone in meatspace adds a whole, long list of annoying demands. Wasting your whole afternoon helping them fix their computer. Going to funerals with them. Toting them around in your car every day after theirs gets repossessed by the bank. Having them show up unannounced when you were just settling in to watch the Dirty Jobs marathon on the Discovery channel, then mentioning how hungry they are until you finally give them half your sandwich. You have so much more control in Instant Messenger, or on a forum, or in World of Warcraft."

So the next time you see someone railing about someone being wrong on the Internet, just remember that It's OK To Be Different. And it's OK to allow other people to be different, annoying and asshole-ish too. In fact, it's necessary.

PS. This is not an invite for the rest of you to show up at my door. Unless you come bearing cookies.

Link courtesy Izhi.

 

Comments

[solo]

I was the person who preferred missing the movie to accommodating the assholes. So I don't really see why, now that I have the option to customize my social experience according to my needs, I shouldn't take full advantage of it. :-)

And IMO it's totally okay to be different and think differently - different is interesting, and challenging, and thought-provoking, and I love it when I come across it (and I do, on my flist and on twitter and in lots of other online spaces). But asshole-ish? I've never put up with that, even before the internet, and I won't now. I don't need friends that badly.

I'd love to show up at your door. :D